I’ve been sporadically posting my joke of the week. The main reason is that I just can’t find any funny jokes. Everything that I find is super corny. They don’t make me crack a smile so I don’t think anyone else wants to see them.
If I find anything even remotely amusing, I’ll be sure to pass it along.
Well I didn’t get the job I applied for. Again! Here’s at least a bonus joke. Maybe it will make someone smile.
JOKE:
The president of a big bank fell off a seagoing yacht.
While his friends frantically sought a life preserver, a sailor shouted, “Hey, can you float alone?”
“Of course I can,” gasped the floundering banker, “but this is a hell of a time to talk business.”
At least it’s funny to me. I wear one of those big shirts/jackets every day at work. I’m always cold and no matter how many muscle supplements or vitamins I take, it doesn’t help. Yesterday was freezing in the office. It was at least 10 degrees cooler than outside so I threw my jacket across my shoulders like a shawl like I always do.
I walked around like that for over an hour before a coworker asked me if I realized that it was inside out! It was funny too because I was serious about being cold and trying to straighten the jacket out. Then I kept wondering why it was still crooked across my back. Well no wonder!
Needless to say, my coworkers and I got a pretty good chuckle about that. And I’ll be sure to check more carefully before I throw the jacket on.
My computer is totally acting up and I can’t access my emails which is where all of my jokes are. I had some jokes on my flash drive but I’ve already used all of them. Maybe by next week I’ll be able to post the jokes back on schedule.
When I don’t post on my regular schedule, it just messes my whole week up.
I try to put up a new joke every week. Sometimes it gets pretty hard to find jokes that are appropriate for everyone to read. I do try to keep that in mind when posting but sometimes the jokes get a little racy. I try not to post anything that will be blatantly offensive though.
I always find a bunch of funny videos but I don’t know how to imbed them. One is a guy practicing karate and kicks someone in the head. Another is called treadmill gangsta. That one is really funny. This guy is running around rapping, grabbing his chain and acting a fool. Then he jumps on his treadmill and falls flat on his back and rolls onto the floor. It’s hysterical.
I want to eventually learn how to embed the videos cause I think they would make a great addition to the joke collection.
Today is supposed to be my joke day. However I can’t find any that I really like. I have some that I think are a little too racy for my blogs but the rest seem to be really lame. They’re some variation of a joke that I’ve already posted. I looked at some sites that I thought had jokes but they focused on other things like the credit crisis, Mesothelioma cancer, or pet care. Those are not exactly joke material.
I’ll keep looking around to see what I can find. Hopefully I can find several jokes so that I can have posts for the next few weeks. If not, then I may have to start soliciting my readers for their favorite jokes.
Hmm, maybe I’ll make it a contest or something. Now that’s something to think about.
Most of the jokes that I use on a weekly basis are recycled. I find them all over the internet and I get some of them by email. But everywhere you look you can find them. I want more original jokes. Not the same old jokes about pet supplements, dogs, cats or hookers. Although the hooker/tranny jokes are usually very funny.
I also love the Little Johnny jokes but I don’t see them anymore. I’ll have to search around and see what I can find.
If you don’t know who Bernie Mac is check out his bio from Wikipedia. He was one of the Original Kings of Comedy (the name of the tour), a raucous tour with 4 comedians known for their crude language and sexual innuendo. He also has his own tv show aptly titled The Bernie Mac Show. He does tone down the language but not the innuendo. He’s very funny if you’re into his type of humor. If not you will definitely be offended.
I was surprised that he was a guest during a Barack Obama fundraiser. That’s not exactly his niche audience so it should have been expected that people would get offended. I mean you don’t invite Eskimos to talk about Winter Park real estate and you don’t invite Bernie Mac to tell jokes in front of a bunch of stiff shirts. It’s a given that they won’t get his humor and be offended.
He wound up getting heckled while on the stage which I’m sure is something he’s not used to. Barack did come out and offer him some advice to “clean up his act”. The joke is actually quite old. It’s something he did in his KOC days. Read the article at ABC to see what the fuss is all about.
I love corny jokes. You know the ones that you read and groan and roll your eyes because they’re so stupid. I love ‘em. Not only that but I laugh like I’m watching Def Comedy Jam or something. I even share them with the people I work with. hehehe.
There’s a candy called Laffy Taffy that has jokes written on the wrappers. My favorite from the past 2 days: What kind of key does not open a lock? A monkey. lololol. Ok seriously if you could see me right now, I giggling my behind off.
It doesn’t take much to make me laugh.
